It’s amazing that neither Natalie Portman nor Scarlett Johansson look very good in The Other Boleyn Girl. Eric Bana brings his usual monkey business, but even he has fouled up that fresh smell that made him such an attractive item in movies such as Homemade Family Vacation Videos 1981 and My Tenth Birthday Home Footage. What many fans may not know about this 1978 birthday film is that this was the project that pushed him above the competition and landed him the role as Bruce Bannister (sic) in The Hulk. The party was themed and Bana rightfully went as the angry green man while most of the other partygoers went as either Peter Parker or Clark Kent. In a way, the 2003 release of The Hulk was something of a reprise for Eric. I guess you can’t blame him for not wanting to do another sequel and why Edward Norton was called. Hello Edward.

Getting back to Natalie Portman, I know a kid who brushed up against her at a public speaking event during her days at Harvard. I have shaken hands with this kid, not as a form of congratulations, but just in making his acquaintance. So, I guess in a way you could say that I have touched Natalie Portman which I’ve always thought was a good thing, but after seeing her in this movie I just can’t shake the feeling that I need to wash my hands.